Blame Beyoncé? Singer Keri Hilson Reveals 7-Yr Hiatus Was Due To Severe Depression
Years ago, Keri Hilson was at the top of her game with hit singles of her own while penning tons of hits for others. With hits like “Turnin’ Me On,” “Knock You Down,” and “Pretty Girls Rock,” fans developed a love for Hilson that seemed as if it would be the beginning of a long-lasting career. However, behind closed doors, Hilson’s life was anything but great. According to Ebony, the singer was faced with a serious bout of depression. Now, after a seven-year hiatus, Hilson is finally opening up about her situation.
Her Personal Battle:
For those who missed it, Keri Hilson recently appeared on the Silence The Shame discussion panel where she opened up about her personal challenges. “When Pretty Girl Rock was at the top of the charts I was bearing the weight of some personal and professional mistakes and they just weighed so heavy on my spirit and I just wasn’t myself,” Hilson said. “When we are not okay, when we are a little low or a lot low, there is a protection mode that has to happen because you don’t know how much our subconscious is soaking in the criticism and the praise,” she said.
She revealed it’s actually been two full years since she pulled the plug on her social media accounts. “For two and a half years, I went ghost from social media. I don’t need the false love or the unwarranted hate. I don’t want any of it so I just left.”
She went on to reveal other factos that online made things worse. “Although I was at the mountain of my life, really the trajectory of my dream – I was at the pinnacle, you know? I was severely unhappy and then add to that, this is when I decide to jump out of an eleven-year relationship. Bad decision, bad timing,” Keri added. ”
2009 — Blame Beyonce’?
Fans first thought that Keri had a problem with Beyoncé when she did a remix to her single “Turnin’ Me On” in which she says “Your vision cloudy if you think that you da best, You can dance, she can sing, but need to move it to the left… She need to go have some babies, she need to sit down, she fake, them other chicks ain’t even worth talkin’ bout.”
Keri Asks The BeyHive To Leave Her Alone
“It’s TOO much!! Please! Is everything I tweet gonna be ‘intentionally misinterpreted’ as a statement about someone/drama I know nothing about?” she pleaded on Twitter in 2013. “You have no idea what your hateful words could do to someone’s spirit. Years of verbal abuse from strangers all day long. Enough is enough! I’m here for MY FANS! I’m stronger than you imagine, but waking up/going to bed to your ugliness is just TOO MUCH, kids. I get it, OK? You can stop now. As far as WHATEVER your really mad about, I had my reasons. It’s been years! Just chalk it up to your ignorance of my reality and LET…IT…GO. As for my mistakes, God has dealt with me.” Fans took this as Keri admitting her Beyon-shade ruined her career.
To try to end the feud and put her back in the good graces of the public, she did an interview with HipHollywood, saying, “No, I don’t have a beef with any female artist. I think it’s just interesting that we live in such a gullible world. Anything that’s written, anything that is posted, and a picture that is interpreted one way, is truth. It’s like bible now. You can Photoshop something, put it out and everyone believes it.”
She admitted the media played a major part in her bout with depression. “You don’t know where a person is, it’s not just about what you are feeding your audience, but what you are doing to the creators. There are a lot of undeserving people that are being attacked by just a headline,” Hilson shared. “You don’t understand some of the worst days of my life were from a lie. An attack on my character. And I am an amazing person. I do say that because I’ve done the work to become that and all I ever wanted to be was just a great human being.”
While many people have preconceived notions about mental health, the harrowing truth is that there are really people suffering in silence. Keri Hilson is one of those women. She admitted how difficult it was to come to terms with the fact that she just couldn’t pick herself up and move forward. “It all just kind of spiraled for me and became something I had never been through; I had never recognized myself as a person who can’t pick themselves back up. I mean, I was literally on stage crying.”
Despite the ongoing effort to downplay the effects of depression, statistics show one in 20 young women aged 20 to 44 suffer from major depression, according to WebMD. Out of those suffering with mild symptoms of depression, only approximately 20% actually seek help. Keri Hilson also shared similar sentiments. “I don’t know many of my peers that actually go to counseling. And I can attest to the fact that it is a process, because it does uproot things. I would have anxiety even going,” Keri said. Dr. Alexander Butwick, a study senior author and associate professor of anesthesiology, perioperative and pain medicine at Stanford University School of Medicine in California, recently offered details about the link between women and depression.
“Depression impacts women of childbearing years who aren’t pregnant,” Dr. Butwick. “By improving awareness of depression in the reproductive years, we may be able to better optimize care before a woman gets pregnant. We can get appropriate counseling and treatment in place before pregnancy, which may help mitigate depression during pregnancy,” Butwick said. “Depression, if uncontrolled, may have an impact on a woman and her pregnancy outcome. If you’re aware of a problem beforehand, you have the luxury of time to plan.”
After years out of the public eye, Keri Hilson admitted she’s finally ready to move forward with her life. Although her depression has gotten better, she admits she still has a few bad days every now and then. “Literally, 7 years of my life have been a battle with depression. And I can’t say that I’m all the way clear, but I’m in the clear.” However, now she knows what to do when the tough tmes come. “Now that I’m back on social media, that subconscious chatter that we are taking into our spirits, it doesn’t resonate, it doesn’t reach that part of me that it once did. So when you are not okay, take that app off of your phone,” she added.
Best of luck to Keri Hilson.